When I met Bala Saheb Thackeray...

The year was 2011 and I had just come back from watching the movie X-Men:First Class with my friends. I was told to reach Kalanagar directly and my parents would pick up from there and we'd go and meet Bala Saheb Thackeray. I lived in blissful oblivion and even though I had  deep interest in politics, I never bothered to look up how great this man was.

We finally entered the hallowed gates of Mathoshree and were greeted by a string of bodyguards,waiting to frisk us.I thought to myself, Oh yes! I am going to meet Bala Saheb and I am carrying guns with me. The minute my mother saw him she broke into tears and a cry of joy emerged. This cry was very similar to that done by Jaya Bachchan when she sees Shah Rukh in Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham. So I went and touched his feet while Uddhav Sir stood took pictures of us together; a good photographer that he is.So Bala Saheb asked me where I was coming from. I told him about the movie and I was thoroughly amazed to know that he had already watched the movie. We discussed about the movie and he told me that I need to do a lot of self pondering to realize what I am meant to do in life and how this movie can be taken up as a case study to understand how human minds work. He told me that he loved Wolverine and the movie was definitely as the name suggests, 'First Class'.

Tea was served and we sat down discussing politics and I told him about my inclination of getting into politics and someday heading the country.We decided to test ourselves and undertake a test to see if what we were doing was really what we were meant to do. We drew up a model which we fondly called,

'The X-Men Self Realization Model’. He drew the sketches of the different characters in the movie while I made a list of things.I agree it wasn't one of the most earnest and intelligent discourse. But Bala Saheb was really fun to talk to and he was very engaging. Very cogent, Trust me!

Given below is the model and I'd like to ask everyone to pick up 2 characters from the one's given below. The results are posted below the picture of Bala Saheb Thackeray- Shiv Sena Supremo.

• Charles Xavier: The telepathic leader and founder of the X-Men.
• Erik Lensherr / Magneto:A mutant capable of manipulating and generating electromagnetic fields.
• Sebastian Shaw:He has the power of absorbing and redirecting kinetic and radiated energy.
• Mystique:A shape-shifting mutant and Charles Xavier's childhood friend.
• Beast:A scientist who is transformed into a frightening-looking mutant in an attempt to cure himself, but is kind at heart.
• Sean Cassidy / Banshee:A mutant capable of ultrasonic screaming,
• Gambit: Gambit possesses the ability to mentally create, control and manipulate pure kinetic energy to his every whim and desire.
• Wolverine: Do I need to describe him?

RESULTS:

1. Charles Xavier: Highly intelligent but reserved.You define a person who is in no need to show how smart he is. Simply brilliant with your work and very humble.
2. Eric Lehnser/Magneto: Raw and the need to control, dominating and very vengeful. Highly commanding and needs people to adhere to his demands.
3. Sebastian Shaw: Arrogance is a characteristic of your personality. You know you have everything but the fact that you can control something makes you wonder you can control everything.If you come down a bit at the level of general mass it would do real good to you.
4. Mystique:Feel the need to keep changing yourself?Not happy with how you are? May be that's why you chose this character.Also, a constant hunger for change is a dominant characteristic of this person.
5. Beast:A people's person and loved by most.You too have the urge to be powerful yet you're very happy with your inner self. You're that person who values one's inner self more than what you see outside.
6. Banshee: Very very creative. Chooses to go by the path nobody would want to go. Not crazy about power but wants to stand out in the crowd.Unique!
7. Gambit:Here comes the stylish one.Who is very conscious about one's appearance. Not a valedictorian, perhaps love for stardom. Women are definitely mad about you! 
8. Wolverine:Hurt and brooding looks.You stand for the raw sensuality that most women look out for.If a woman has chosen this character then you're that person who's just fancied by the way he carries himself.Its not the need for power that dominates your personality but the want for good to triumph over evil.

So I asked Bala Saheb which one he had chosen and I was indeed bewildered by his choice of characters. Bala Saheb chose Banshee and Magneto! Surprised aren't you? Now I was completely sure and our claims that this model is effective were validated by Bala Saheb's choice.

What you saw on the stage was exactly what Bala Saheb was in real life. His characteristic speeches, which were intelligently peppered with substance and laced with wit and sarcasm bordering on vulgarity which finds no parallel in the political spectrum, mesmerized the youth. Just when I was about to ask him to say a few lines from his favorite speech, I was rudely awaken by my mother. Her morning quarrel with Manisha (Our maid) awoke me from my deep slumber.And the dream of sitting next to Bala Saheb was shattered. Today being 18th of November, Bala Saheb being no more...

Respect to the man whose one call would awaken lacs of people in Maharashtra and ring bells all the way up to Delhi.
An Enigma I shall never forget!

Don't know which speech of his to listen? Just check out his oratory skills in this video.Bala Saheb Thackeray Speech

PS: The X-Men Self-Realization model still stands true as I have already experimented in on at least 30 people with about 90% accuracy.
You're free to criticize and I request everyone to please CRITICIZE my writings by leaving an ANONYMOUS comment below this article. ANONYMOUS if you're intimidated by me.

The Female Story on Facebook!

I have always wondered why women get more ‘likes’ on Facebook as compared to men? Although I have been on Facebook for about 5 years now, I tend to underestimate the power of it and initially was really skeptical about the whole idea. I never thought Facebook would last beyond 4 years and I was pretty convinced that it would eventually follow the same suit as Orkut.

And here we are, almost 8 years after the launch of this mastermind platform called ‘Facebook’, glued to it day in and day out. Now, there are cell phones with special click button especially for Facebook but not a special click button to the Helpline. Funny, isn't it? How one piece of technology and innovation can alter our lives!

However, all’s not well for the people on Facebook. There are the ‘Social Butterflies’ with over 5,000 friends but can hardly remember the names of 100. Facebook has been able to gather crowd from various age groups. The minimum age required to join Facebook is 13. Even so, there are children below the age 12 who are hooked on to Facebook to play the free ‘cool’ games and bombard everyone on their lists with game requests. We also have our Old Folk who are utterly captivated by the beauty of Facebook and are going gaga about it. The fact that the oldies can connect to their long-lost friends (Of course those who are still alive.) is very fascinating to them. Women tend to put up pictures to appease their friends and fish for compliments. Young girls often mistake Facebook for a personal diary and pour out their puberty-fuelled emotions. Boys, on the other hand, try to display their Macho side even if does not exist.

Gone are the days when you'd have to actually call up people to ask where they were and what they were doing. Just recently, I had this friend from college who messaged his mother saying he was busy with class and the very next moment his mother liked his Facebook post which declared, 'XXX Is at IMAX with Sexy Lady (Name Undisclosed).'

So how much do we believe what we see on Facebook?

We (Chinmay & Ria) decided to conduct a quick experiment. Both of us put up the exact same status on our respective Facebook pages and gave it some time to check out how many people will actually our status.
Our main aim was to prove that women generally evoke more response on Facebook than men.

The status:

'Success is like a fart.

It only bothers people when it's not their own.'

Our findings suggested the following:

•  Ria Shenoy ended up with 21 more likes than Chinmay Shenoy
•  Nobody commented on Chinmay's status but there was 1 comment on Ria's.

Now, this is something we got from the results but according to the predictions or the actual ratio what should have been the real output? 

•  Chinmay has 1950 friends on Facebook whereas Ria has 1069  thus  Chinmay has almost 82% more friends than Ria.
• If Chinmay got 14 likes then the according to the prediction, Ria should have gotten 8 likes (7.69  to be precise) and nothing more.
• Furthermore, Ria ended up getting 35 likes and that is 27 likes more than what was predicted being almost 438% higher!

This is a two part series and all our findings along with the conclusion will be highlighted in the next post.
The second part will include:
a) How differently people react to serious as well as a stupid status updates.
b) The kind of people who like our status.

Why did I think about this? In case you didn't know already, there are some geniuses out there who like their own status! I found a Facebook group which gives the perfect explanation for this ridiculous behaviour, "Liking your own status is like Hi5ing yourself in public"

Sometimes, Ignorance is NOT Bliss

I asked a friend if he read the newspaper and he replied, ‘Yes of course. I read Bombay Times everyday’. Mon cheri, unless you are enrolling for a Bollywood Trivia Quiz or you are one of the few people who are interested in where the ‘cool’ Page 3 crowd is partying, Bombay Times is not news. The only reason I use it is to check movie timings.

The youth are not expected to read every inch of the newspaper or know what’s happening in some remote African country. But it is really shameful if you are well aware of the brand of underwear Kareena Kapoor is wearing and have no idea who the 13^th President of India is. The first thing the youth of our nation need to do is get off Facebook and get a reality check.

Television news channels like ‘IndiaTV’ have managed to make a mockery of all other respectable news channels. 

 

News Anchors are supposed to give an unbiased view of the political situation in the country. However, many a time we see them asking questions motivated by prejudices. How are we to form an opinion of our own if we don’t see both sides of the story?

When we think of youth-led media we only think of MTV, Channel V and a host of other music channels. The ‘M’ in MTV is long gone now and all they air are mindless reality shows which I personally feel, will lead to the decadence of our intellectual capabilities.

Take an average sixteen-year-old boy for example. Do you think he would want to watch a 40-something Old Uncle talk about the current state of the economy rather than watching a 20-something in a miniskirt? (What she’s talking about automatically becomes interesting to them). So why not get the pretty girl to talk about something relevant?

What I am trying to say is, we should make the youth enlighten the youth. After all, who understands the sorrows of puberty better than an adolescent himself. 

Rein Rain's Reign

So the rains seem to have arrived and there’s no running away. According to me, the only reason to want rains is because without it, I would have to spend October to December suffering constant water cuts.

To make you more aware of the fact, there is Facebook where my dear friends have now turned into weather reporters. You don’t need to put up ‘Rains <3’ or ‘Weather :D’ every time it starts drizzling, we have a window for crying out loud!

Okay, I agree that after 3 months of scorching heat and sunblock, the clouds do prove to be a relief. But can you handle this gloomy, depressing weather for the next 4 whole months?

Besides, it’s not just the melancholic sky. I haven’t even begun to describe the main problem yet. The Rain.

I don’t have an issue with water falling on my head and body, really. It’s just that I’d rather have that happen in the bathroom than when I’m well-dressed and ready to go out.

The monsoon is a lucky time for roadside perverts who ogle at women. They hit their jackpot when a girl is dressed in white, walking on the street and it happens to rain. It’s a treat to their lecherous eyes.

Another thing beyond my comprehension is how anyone can find rains romantic. I don’t deny the fact that everything looks beautiful during the rains but that’s only when I’m in the comforts of my home. Ask the poor desperados who can’t seem to find a room and find it appropriate to get to second base under an umbrella in their neighbourhood garden.

The next move, according to protocol is for newspapers and magazines to go and interview jobless celebrities about how they spend their monsoon. I can assure you, the only answer you’re going to get is “Drinking Hot chai and eating bhajiyas.” I mean wow, you’re so amazingly innovative, nobody has ever thought of doing that before.

It’s needless to remind you that the maximum number of diseases that spread are during the monsoon and every time you think of eating something off the street, your mother’s admonishing voice will play in your head warning you about the threats of consuming outside food during monsoon.

To all the monsoon-lovers, if you like the rains so much you should like the filth too. I mean, isn’t it a delight to have disgusting muck on your clothes and shoes? You must also love the annoyingly large number of flies that find a home in yours. Especially the enormous, blue ones that find it appropriate to share your food.

Don’t even get me started on the traffic jams and the mess the BMC creates. Abandoning past projects during the monsoon is what they specialize in. The numerous potholes are maddening. You don’t need to go to a theme park to experience the “Bumpy Ride”, just drive on Mumbai roads.

The only time I’m going to stop my rant is when people finally admit that everything is NOT hunky dory during the rains. I know that there are very few people who are going to support me on this matter. Call me a cynic but I am one of the few who don’t like the rains much. But there’s no harm in voicing your opinion, is there?

Stupefying Bombed-Bay

When it is dark in the east, it is light in the west; when things are dark in the south there is still light in the north.

-Anonymous 

The engine roars, gears meshed with a growl and thunk. The jungle. The menace.


That's the Traffic in Mumbai for you. Here, honking doesn't signify that the bust is about to start, the only indicator you're going to get is a BEST bus driver who scowls at you and menacingly spits out a jet of vivid red betel juice. 

The bridges in Mumbai have done no good but added to the woes of the already deteriorating traffic conditions in Mumbai. The smoulders of shame and guilt flames into anger and a fist-tightening rage at the deceitful approach the government has. 

Is this what we pay the endless amount of taxes for? Politicians and government workers were supposed to practice altruism but what we really get to see is a nonchalant attitude. 

The egregious condition of roads makes me feel like the vehicles have suddenly burst into a ballistic dance as the buses and automobiles churn through the roads of Mumbai with astonishing efficiency. The fact that with great ease and an awe-inspiring laxness we still manage to bring into power the same goons is really esoteric. 

Striking a perfect balance between having a bovine placidity in their face and posture and yet a stern countenance, a great deal of money and a lot of respect (famous or infamous, who cares?) they are able to earn. 

I really wonder what future we are headed for as the older generations are not upright, how can you expect the younger generations to respect them? 
It is really difficult to make them understand that a lifetime of good is really not enough but a single day of evil is too much. 

The 'taxiwalas' are the ones who really make our lives miserable. Being the sole breadwinners, they wade through the traffic even faster. It is as if they are racing against time, like an NFS Underground - Reality Version. At times, they move at an exasperatingly slow pace.


The Two-wheelers: It's my road you freaks I takes to ply on these roads with my majestic riding styles. If there is traffic on the road, no problem, I can still jump onto the footpath with ease and ride through malevolently. Helmets? What for? I am not going to die. Look at the traffic in Mumbai. There are remote chances that I would even be able to cross 30 on these roads, so how can I die? This indefinite ignorance and indifference has been a real cause for concern. Nonetheless, having a two-wheeler seems to be the easiest mode of transport. 
The four-wheelers: The most exotic place to be at even though you're in Mumbai would definitely be your four-wheeler. The clandestine affairs that start and end inside the rigid chassis of your four wheeler. So many ways you can really make the experience inside your four wheeler a memorable one. 


1) Windows rolled up (sounds cool, no?)

2) The darkest possible tints ( Mafiosa) 

Be it the traffic or the politicians, Mumbai as well as India as a whole seems to be in a very big mess. The callous behavior of Mamata Banerjee though unmatched to that by Shah Rukh Khan after his team won the IPL just shows how domineering a state head can be just to pave way for another successful term as the Chief Minister of West Bengal and the head of Trinamool Congress.

 3) The heaviest and the loudest system which would literally make an outsider feel some kind of drumming in their skin.

4) Political party sticker is a must. How else can you escape the legitimate goons? (The Pandus) The conjuring trick that palms and conceals the hundred rupee note with skill. The Pandu then reciprocates your gesture with a guileless smile, like the one shown by an infant. 

5) The endless, intense moments of passion and 'lurve' really makes me envy and literally plead to my dad to give me one damn car. I really don't care if it's a Maruti or an Aston Martin. I just need it for the quality time I can spend in it.

God bless India, I really don't know where it is heading but surely India economy is heading to an Apocalypse far more severe in nature than the 21st December 2012. 

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Mosquitoes: To Kill Or Not To Kill

Mosquitoes were supposed to be gone by summer. Our dear unwelcome guests have unfortunately extended their stay. We are in the month of June and I still have two annoying mosquitoes hovering above my head just waiting for an opportunity to suck on my precious blood.

I watch them “chilling” on my hand and I try to make a swift ninja-type move hoping to successfully squat them and FAIL.
I feel like a loser. I can’t even kill a mosquito. One time, I tried to squash one between my palms and it flew away alive. I’m sure even a five year old could do better than that.


Life would have been so much easier if mosquitoes sucked fat instead of blood.

I am back to staring at my computer screen now and they still wont let me live in peace. Mosquito #1 is still desperately trying to settle on my arm while Mosquito #2 is making that exasperating buzzing sound near my ears. Oh that sound, it makes me want to pull my eardrums out.


It still amuses me that the mosquitoes that sting are female. To all the men out there, a mosquito buzzing and a woman nagging may sound pretty much the same. In our defense, the male mosquitoes lie around doing nothing except, well, mate ;) 


One of my handiest purchases last winter was the mosquito electrocution racket. A single movement of the wrist and you have the joy of watching those bothersome, bloodsucking little devils burn to death. Also, because of its tennis racket façade, one gets the cheap thrill of jumping and electrocuting mosquitoes and then feeling like Roger Federer. However, the racket is beyond my arm’s reach right now and I am too lazy to get up and go get it. So I decide to kill them myself. 


I know I may sound like a sadist but I honestly believe mosquitoes are Satan in insect form and if we don’t annihilate them now, they are a potential threat to human kind.

Exaggeration? So it may seem but no, mosquitoes have wrecked my sleep countless number of times and I have spent several days being sleep-deprived looking like a zombie. No sleep=No energy to do anything= No success= Ruined Life.


I have an unspoken agreement with insects around here. You fly around, do nothing to me, I will not bother you. But if you exploit your freedom and irritate me, little daredevil, you have to go.


My last drop of humanity just evaporated. Mosquito Slayer Mode: ON.

I don't want to seem like a brutal murderer so I try to convince myself that I am a part of nature and I am genetically programmed to defend myself against something that is trying to feed on me. 




Bottom Line: Kill Mosquitoes
They’re so annoying i’m sure even Mother Nature thinks it’s alright to kill 
them.






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Of Acne and Ecstasy

I am assuming everyone is well aware of the new law being passed by the empirical Government of India making consensual sex between teenagers below the age of 18 as an act of utmost disregard and a bailable offence (Up to 3 years of imprisonment to be precise). Of all the myriad transgressions and regressions needing legal remedy the Cabinet approved this bill much to everyone's amusement.

 Today, we live in an age when teenagers like you and me (I am just over 20) have become sexually active at an earlier age. It’s understood of someone like a 'pervert chacha ' or even fathers -clothing out a totally perverse sense of 'Family Honor'; this particular bill wants to take into its ambit even the 18 year old.

 Yes, believe it or not, next time you plan to take your girl out to Manori Beach just to have some 'fun time' and constantly reminding yourself to carry a condom, THINK TWICE. You're about to break the law! 

 The state needs to stop intervening and retire from the 'Who’s the Daddy? ' Status because it festers the idea of sex as some hush- hush perversion which in fact needs to be dealt with by an open dialogue between parents and their children and a better understanding of what's going around.

 It is all due to the effect of the West that premarital sex has been on such a high. It is used just to calm your raging hormones right from the time you hit puberty. With the advent of cell phones, tablets and of course 3G in India, sex and porn had become more easily available to the masses; who doesn't want to be updated with the latest videos on Porn hub? Just go through a boy’s laptop and search for the folders named, ‘Games, FIFA, Finance, Important etc. ' and you'd fine terabytes of porn. 

 All in all I must admit I am still wondering in which age are our policy-makers living. At 18, a girl is believed to have developed the maturity to make decision of her own and know how to choose her partner for life but unfortunately just before that having sex for her is a crime? Not to forget these are the same men who with their own grubby paws and stubble faces are ready to grab the next butt available just to soothe their frenzied libidos.

 So now according to the law of the land the potential danger to India's social and economic stability is us than the corrupt politicians, corporate swindlers and of course the thugs. Aren’t we?

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                               Ria Shenoy              

                                                          

The Stupid Smile

At this very moment, I am staring at my computer screen and thinking what could be the next thing I can write about. I ponder over it for quite sometime and array of thoughts run through my head and I find myself smiling stupidly at the computer for no goddamn reason. 


What exactly is the stupid smile?


I am strolling nonchalantly. All of a sudden, I remember a joke that a friend cracked in the morning and I smile to myself. To me, it’s absolutely normal. To the guy who walked past me right now, who is obviously unaware of my thought process, it may seem, well, creepy.  Bordering on mental. And I still continue to smile in blissful oblivion. Stupidly. 


The Stupid Smile is imbecilic combined with foolish and a dash of sheepish. The Smile that makes you look extremely intelligent in the eye of the beholder. (Sense the Sarcasm)


I can assure you, at one point in time all of us have been a victim of the stupid smile.


Here’s another instance, you accomplished a not-so-easy objective in front of all your friends and now you’re feeling smug about it. There is no way in hell that you can wipe that grin off your face! To you it’s absolutely normal. To everyone else around you though, it’s stupid.



The Stupid Smile also makes an appearance when someone compliments you and you know you deserve it because you checked yourself out and you liked what you saw. You actually want to say “I know.” but you obviously can’t say that out loud so you continue to give the person a polite smile and a modest ‘Thanks’ but little did you know it made you look well, Stupid.


You’re walking down the street, you trip and fall. Your friends saw you and laughed. You don’t want to embarrass yourself so you try to flash the “Its no big deal” smile but in reality you’re flashing the “I tripped in public, I’m trying not to look stupid” smile. And as always, after all the efforts, you do look stupid in the end.


It’s your birthday. You and your friends are standing around the birthday cake and all of them are singing the Birthday Song to you. You have no idea what to do with yourself so you smile at them. If only someone had clicked a picture of you at that moment would you know how stupid you looked.


The Stupid Smile Exchange:
You are in deep thought. Your mind is elsewhere and your eyes are fixated at one point thinking it’s a blank space. However, it isn’t a blank space and you are staring at someone with great intensity and you don’t even realize it. The subject is conscious and doesn’t know how to react to your weird behaviour so he/she gives you a Stupid Smile hoping that finally you’ll stop staring. That is when you realize that you’ve been staring at him/her all this while and return the Stupid Smile.


Smile Analysis isn’t exactly my forte but writing about silly things no one thinks about is.


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Chronicles of a 75% Engineer

It all started in 2009... Results of my HSC and MHT CET were just around the corner. The pressure was mounting to select the perfect and most interesting engineering branch. (I tried my level best to strike a balance between what was monetarily more appealing and my passion for the subject.) 

After a point, it didn't matter to me if I was really interested in getting into a particular field as most of my concentration was on how much money I would be making. A callow thought that nearly shattered my ambitions.

The results were out and an air of melancholy surrounded me as an imbecile marking error in my mathematics paper had ruined my CET score. Although my HSC score still remained at its best, everyone had an indifferent attitude towards it.  Scoring 90 percent is not exactly a piece of cake. It isn't something every Tom Dick and Harry can get! But as they say 'Family members that live in concord and acceptance are the ones who live in peace' 

I still managed to secure my admission in one of the premier institutions in Mumbai in one of the most sought after fields - Computer Engineering.

In the beginning, computers seemed to be interesting. Typing lines of codes on an outdated Windows XP seemed more like a first grade programmer. The thrill in writing hundreds and thousands of meaningless lines of codes made me feel like I'm the next Mark Zuckerberg. As months passed by the ever so interesting Computer engineering had become stale and everyone was taking potshots at it. The real task at hand still remained that I had to transform from using the logical side of my brain to a side which involved-

                              No Understanding. 

                              No Logic.

Semester after semester, everyone was involved in a horse race to rank number 1 with insufficient knowledge or inclination to continue in the field after graduation. What really irks me is that even after years of hard work and a hundred thousand graduates the quality and practicality of our engineering syllabus still remains an enigma.

Apparently, engineers are considered as the future of the nation. Wow. Whoever said this must really be devoid of the current scenario and the sorrow state of affairs of the dearest engineering education. 

They say appearances are deceptive. Recently, at a party of a very close friend and a topper from the EXTC department in my college, I stood amidst the nerdiest crowd in the whole of Mumbai which I'm assuming are too genteel. And then, I spot a boy with his shirt tucked in, a black archaic belt and the stereotype nerdy glasses. He was the topper of my college and ranked 3rd in the University of Mumbai. The ideal student, every parent's delight. The kind of guy you expect to do no wrong. However, he was standing right beside me taking innocent puffs from his Marlboro, a quarter of Old Monk in hand.

A zealous young me wasn't able to understand the gravity of the situation. What if I'm unable to score even a 40 in my papers? If I don't get a job, I'm considered to be a good-for-nothing wastrel who is better suited to work in the nearest call centre.  

A lot of people don't know about this but corruption is highly rampant in this section of the society too. You want to pass a particular paper? No Issues at all!

Recently, software major Infosys sent an open letter to the University of Mumbai focusing on how unequipped the engineering graduates from Mumbai were to face the real life tasks. A number of companies even blacklisted a few colleges due to the immense dissatisfaction and negative feedback they received from the employers about how incompetent these engineers really were.

Precisely it's been 913 days that I've been studying engineering. Another 500 days to go and then I'm done with it. I'm bemused; I have developed this strange liking for computers. I have always been quite sure about my future in Finance/Marketing but this technical side of my brain is making me reconsider my decision .I probably misconstrued it to be a disastrous decision and without thoroughly looking into it made assumptions about how miserable my life would be if I ever thought about continuing in the technical stream . if I do end up becoming a Software Developer/Software Analyst I would be just bewilder myself as well as everyone around me .  I see my friends being involved in a fist-tightening rage as they look forward to appearing for the various competitive examinations. A year to go and so many decisions to make, the most crucial decision of my life.

“Believe it or not, it’s the struggle alone that pleases us. It’s never about victory. When the right things are done in an ethical manner success is bound to touch your feet .Even the strongest have their moments of fatigue. Why worry about the destination? Journey should be gratifying.”

                                               - Chinmay Vasudev Shenoy

Gleeful Gluttony

Have you ever felt a hunger so intense it may seem close to being insatiable?
Felt like you have the capacity to consume everything on Earth and still be hungry enough to scan the universe for more? 


I can't cook for the life of me! However, I am mighty pleased with the progress I have made in recent times. I can now successfully make palatable tea and Maggi :D. This isn't enough to satisfy the demands of my stomach, nevertheless.


On certain days, life is all about eating. Those are the days when you compare yourself to an animal, where the sole purpose of your existence is to fulfil your gastronomical needs. 


Here is how my schedule goes:
7am:  Mom, where's my breakfast?
11am: What if I get hungry in class? I should have a pre-lunch snack.
1pm: MOOOM! LUNCH! FEED ME, I'M STARVING.
3pm: It's been 2 hours since I ate I guess its okay to have a post-lunch snack.
5pm: Every evening calls for a snack :')
8pm: MOM! What's for dinner?
12pm: Its a brand new day! Let's celebrate it with a snack.


My hunger is at its peak when I'm studying. The only thing to look forward during a study session is food. That's the time you feel that your brain will stop functioning if you don't have food in your mouth. 


Another annoying habit : Study for an hour. Walk to kitchen. Open the fridge door. Check for food. Go back to studying. Repeat the same procedure and be disappointed by the fact that no new food has magically appeared in the past hour. 


Also, the "Single on Valentine's Day Dilemma" : This Valentine's, we've decided to change the adage from "I'm single and ready to mingle" to "I'm single and looking for a Pringle"


The "Meme Obsessed and Hungry" syndrome : I'm going to ask the MemeBase to make a "Forever Hungry" meme with my face.

The "Eager Waiter": You're at a restaurant and you're hungry. You've placed your order. Now you gawk expectantly at every waiter who passes by with food in his hand hoping your turn has arrived.


The "Food Hider" condition: My favourite food! There are hardly any of these left! What if someone eats them? Let me hide it in a secret location and no one needs to know. 


The "I'm possessive about my food" infirmity: Yes, I know I offered you a bite. But that's just out of courtesy. It doesn't give you ANY right to take the first bite. Nor does it give you the right to take any more bites! Take one more and I'll bite your head off. 

"Share hunger on Facebook" disorder: Oh god I'm so hungry! Let me make a Facebook group about how much I love food and see how many people share the same sentiments!

"There's no food in the house" disaster: Earthquake, I can handle that. Tsunami, bring it on! Tornado, does that sound like Cornetto to you?
Theres no food in the house, DISASTER! God, what did I ever do to you to make me see this dreadful day?


And finally, this one's for me :),
The "Incessantly Hungry Blogger": I love food so much. Let me blog about it and let people know!


If you've read this post you may think I weigh a 100 kilograms. Not even close, but I'm getting there. 
I'm going to sign off now, all this food-centric writing has made me hungry again!


                                                      - Ria Shenoy 

WhY d0 pEoPle tAlK liKe tHiS ?

After the advent of cellphones, SMS language came along and so did the extermination of English grammar. I get the logic behind SMS language but why anyone would put in additional efforts to capitalize every alternate letter is beyond my comprehension. 

What irks me more is modifying normal words in a miserable attempt to sound 'cool'. Believe me, 'kewl' is NOT cool. There is no rational explanation for typing in this disastrous manner.The sole purpose of SMS language was to reduce texting time. You're typing the same number of alphabets so you're not achieving that either!  

My sincere request, 'Puhleez' grow up and get a reality check or else, i'm 'sowwie' to say, but one fine day people will throw 'Rawks' at you and then only 'Gawd' can save you. 

Yet another annoying aspect, excessive punctuations.

Do you want to sound like you're on an adrenaline rush ?

What difference would it make if you typed "Hey!" instead of "Hey!!!!!!!!!!!"

It just makes you sound unnecessarily excited and personally, I find it kind of creepy. 

Using a zillion dots is also vexatious. An ellipsis consists of three dots. It's supposed to indicate a short pauses or breaks in the writer's train of thought not a mini coma.

And finally coming to chat abbreviations, I know you're in a hurry but you're not exactly the busiest person in the world. Why butcher the English language?

It won't kill you to write 'what's up' instead of 'Ssup' or 'wazza'.I can still fathom using it if you don't have a qwerty keypad. I honestly don't see the laboriousness in typing a complete, grammatically correct word when all the alphabets lay right in front of you. 

I blame it on our youth who are incapable of finding their own identity and hence try to ape the west. Typing 'ma' instead of 'my' won't make you American. Contrary to what you pseudos may think, it does not make you sound like a rap artist either.

Don't be ashamed of who you are and where you're from. Don't be a poser. Keep it natural. 

                                                           @ShenoyChinmay
@Fooljhadi